Love life feeling stale lately? That’s a sign you’re stuck in a sexual rut, and you’ll need to work together to get out of it. It’s okay to find yourself stuck; it happens even to the happiest couples. What matters is the way you work together to overcome it.
Sexual Rut
Talk to Each Other
Communication is essential to overcoming this tricky stage of your relationship. But be mindful of the way you communicate. Avoid phrasing your words in such it way it seems like you’re blaming them for the boredom you feel in the relationship. For example, don’t say, “We’re stuck in a rut” or “The way the relationship is going right now is boring, don’t you think?”. Instead, be gentle when you communicate and say “Let’s work together and figure out what we can do.”
Don’t Get Angry With Each Other
The first reaction by either partner might be to feel defensive but avoid getting angry with each other. It is important to communicate honestly, and you or your partner may not feel comfortable doing that if they know it’s going to make the other person mad. Then again, if you don’t talk about it, the problem is not going to fix itself, and acknowledging that there is a problem is the first step to repairing what might need to be fixed in your relationship. Getting angry or upset about it and lashing out at each other is only going to make the situation worse. Whenever there’s a problem, especially something like this involving your sex life, stay calm, talk about it and try to work things out.
Try Some Nonsexual Changes
The boredom you feel might not entirely be bedroom related. Perhaps your routine together has become too mundane in general. If you suspect that might be adding to it, try making some changes or do something new together. Try a new restaurant, go for a walk together, explore a new city, go away a short getaway together. A change of routine can feel refreshing if you’ve been doing the same old thing day in and day out.
Changing Your Look
It’s not a necessity, but if it makes you feel better and gives you a confidence boost, this is one to consider. Getting a makeover can make us feel like a new and improved version of ourselves, and a shift in perspective is enough to spark a sense of excitement again. Get a haircut, get some new clothes, new makeup, whatever you feel like to boost your spirits.
Keep Growing and Learning
It’s hard to feel bored when you’re always learning something new and growing both as an individual and a couple. Even better, take up activities you can do together, so you’re both learning, growing, and bonding at the same time. Pick up a new hobby, read a book together, take a new class or course, learn a new skill together. There’s no end to the possibilities once you start looking and discovering something new you might not have known about each other can make you see your partner in a whole new light.
