If you identify as being masculine or feminine, it can be fun to switch roles. If you’ve never considered which gender (not sex) you identify with, it can be a great identity-building exercise for both you and your partner.
It’s totally cool to identify more with feminine energies if you’re male and vice versa.
Engage in Role Play
Just connect with whatever feels the most true and comfortable. Then, when it comes to sexual play, try the other side of the equation for a change.
If you’re used to leading and being in control, be more trusting and surrender yourself to your partner. If you’re used to going with the flow, step up and take charge of the direction.
Role-playing is a good way to add variety to your sex life and bring some of your fantasies closer to reality. If you’ve always dreamed of doing your boss or the plumber or the cheerleader but never did or would, ask your partner to step into that role for a night.
Even if you haven’t had a long-term fantasy that involves role-play, it’s fun to pretend to be someone different in bed, be it a president, priestess, virgin, or muse.
One way to take your role-playing to the next level is to introduce costumes. Pick some up around Halloween or find a sexier version of classic fantasy roles at your local sex shop or online.
For those who have a hard time letting down their guard and fully engaging in acting, costumes can help submerge them in the fantasy. After all, it’s hard to act like an all-business executive if you’re dressed like Bo Peep or a rock star.
Use a Blindfold
If you really want your lover to anticipate how you’re going to pleasure him or her next, use a blindfold or create your own using a scarf or silk sash. Ties can work as well, though sometimes they’re too thin to really cover the eyes.
Ask your partner to keep the blindfold on until you remove it so you can tantalize by touching your partner in different ways and with different toys. This will build the sexual tension as your partner awaits your next move with nervous excitement.
Tickle with Feathers
One way to tease your partner’s senses is by using a feather wand. You can find one at most sex stores, or you can improvise by using a new feather duster from the drugstore. The feel of a delicate, almost ticklish feather on the skin can make your partner quiver with anticipation or just enjoyment, especially if you intersperse the use of this light sensation with deep kisses and caresses all over your partner’s body.
